Last night, after my son just finished his high school football game, around 930 pm or so, we decided to go to Wawa to get some hoagies. I wanted to go to Buffalo Wild Wings because they serve beer but it was getting late and I knew that keeping James out late when he had practice at 8am the following day just so I could have beers would not be very popular on the home front. I did it the week before. The beers were so good. I had a few big Coors Lights. I'm into Coors Light lately. I went from Broken Skull IPA to Coors Light. Soft.
So I was getting out of my truck last night at the Wawa and this lady is coming across the parking lot towards me. Now, this happens to me all the time. People tell me their life stories out of the blue and start talking to me about everything. One girl asked me 20 questions about the WILL OVER HOPE tattoo on my arm. Anyway, she was around 65, about 5'4, pretty round but not obese, with long gray hair in a ponytail. And earrings. I remember she had like little pink heart earrings. So she's about 10 feet from me and she throws up her arms as she is getting closer to me like a preacher singing hallelujah, and she yells to me, I AM NOT A HOOKER! I was like, too bad! No, actually, I said, you are not a hooker? Well, neither am I. She was druuuunnnkkkk. She had like no teeth that I could see. Definitely not meth, maybe pills but definitely alcohol. So she then tells me where she lives in the trailer down the street and how she's not a hooker and I think she said not a drug addict too, but then she asked me for 3 bucks. To get into her house or something. or maybe it was for food. I can't remember, I just keep thinking that I was glad she wasn't a hooker, but she wouldn't be all that bad if you were into that old lady with no teeth drunk off her ass kind of thing. Wow, she was so disappointed when I wouldn't give her three dollars for god knows what. When I told her no, she started moaning and making noises and she was still looking at me with her mouth open as I was driving away. Moaning, I guess. Then, I swear, as we were driving away, I looked at the gas pump and a lady was standing there pumping gas and if she wasn't a hooker, nobody is. I wonder if the old lady went over to her and insulted her by saying that she wasn't a hooker, and could she spare 3 bucks?
